To the Girl I’m Leaving Behind.

Exactly three months out from move-in day. Most days, packing up and leaving early sound like a dream come true. Between working at a retail store that is in the process of liquidating, juggling a social life, parents who are only frustrating to say the least, all while trying to maintain some sanity has been practically impossible. I’ve got twenty years of life and history in this little old town and the surrounding area. Lived in this very bedroom i sit in now all twenty years of my life. My family is here, my friends are here, everything is here.

Everything, though, doesn’t always carry positivity behind it. Some of the worst days of my life have been here. Losing family, break-ups, arguments with friends. The very best and worst days of my life have all been spent in this tiny radius of space. I have no plans to just become this whole other person while I’m away at college, but this is a chance to really figure out who I am, what I want in life. The person I am now could be worse, but i’m also not a huge fan of her at this very moment. over stressed, over worked. I’ve got a big mouth, an even bigger attitude. I’m always looking to pick fights and when I’m mad, i’m horribly mean. I lose motivation easily, I’ve gained a lot of weight that I have little motivation to burn off.

To the girl I’m leaving behind, you’ve been the me I’ve only ever been familiar with. twenty years in one space, unable to really start fresh. no matter how many times i’ve tried to change, there is no such thing as a fresh start in the same place. especially somewhere where you grow up around the same people. So, to the me i’ve been for the past twenty years of my life. You’ve gotten me places I may have never dreamed to go. I’ve also put myself in a rough spot once or twice before because of this attitude and my lack of filtering thoughts. It’s been a rough go, and while moving 1000+ miles away doesn’t mean life is automatically easier, especially being it’s for college, it does mean people don’t have a preconceived notion of who i am or what i’ve been through. this isn’t an attempt to be fake and present myself as a perfect human. this does, however, give me a chance to change how i treat people, how i see myself. more confident, less mouthy. more active physically and emotionally.

there’s so much i’m scared about in moving away. the debt, how i’ll even afford it in the first place. not having a single familiar face for the first few months while i surround myself with strangers. a new town that is small but nothing like home. however, there is so much more potential in every single bit of it.

now’s your chance, don’t screw it up.

xx bw

Who am I?

Well let me start of by saying this is not my first attempt at a blog. However, I’d like to think that my blogging skills are a little more advanced than they were when I was sixteen. So, without further ado let us dive into the lovely world of, well.. me!

My name for starters is Bri! Short for Brianna, and spelled with the “i” not the double “e” that just about every other Bree I knew went by.

I was raised and still live in suburban Illinois, somewhere around an hour north of Chicago. So, yes, if you ask me I’ll probably say I’m from Chicago because nobody knows the little village I actually live in. Nor do you need to.

I’m a few months short of officially being one of those obnoxious twenty-somethings that everyone swears are out to destroy the world. Although if you ask me I’m pretty sure I don’t have a clue what i’m doing with my life so destroying the world is a little too much for my plate right now.

I’m a college student currently attending community college for two more semesters before it’s off to university to expand my horizons a little bit. ( quite literally considering I haven’t lived anywhere but this home for almost twenty years ). I am also an aunt of three nieces, three nephews, and one unknown on the way! Beyond that I am a sister and the youngest sibling of three. Two older brothers and a half sister as well.

The little things in life I consider important include coffee, looking up pictures of insanely cute desk organization photos, complaining about my math homework because let’s face it, math and I will never be friends. I also have this wild dream of moving to Ireland one day and living on a bunch of land and raising sheep, but if you want to be more realistic I’ll probably move to Chicago after college and ( hopefully ) get a job teaching considering that’s the major I’m studying. Anything involving french culture, count me in, because I also have this dream that one day I’ll own a vacation home in the south of France where my dream family and I will go every summer. In the words of Clueless, As if!

To top it all off, I am hopelessly in love with fashion and all the art that goes with it. My style is a mess of neutral and preppy ( how those can go together.. well, they can’t, but I made it happen ). I love layering and big cozy sweaters, but I’ll also find a way to wear Lilly Pulizter in the winter and call it holiday wear. For being a broke college kid, I have a bad habit of shopping and hopefully one day my dream closet will magically appear.

Hopefully my dry humor and my love for fashion and lifestyle tips will bring you back for my next post in the coming days. If so, I can’t wait for you to see what is in store.

And as I always sign off on all my work,

XX BW

( having the same initials as the fictional character of blaire waldorf does in fact make me feel a little more classy )